The Internet - OI edition.
Beijing: we want lights and precision and a good clean night
London: FUCK IT LETS MAKE IT THE SHIRE AND GET FRANK TURNER!
AND LETS MAKE THE WHOLE THING VICTORIAN, BRING LOCKHEART TOO ONLY IF HE HAS A TOP HAT, MUSTN'T FORGET JK ROWLING AND BRING MR BEAN TOO ONLY IF YOU DO A CHARIOT OF FIRE MONTAGE. DAMMIT LETS HAVE A SHIT TON OF LIGHTY BEDS AND ABOUT 12 MARY POPPINS, NOW WE MUST MONTAGE BRILLIANT ENGLISH MUSIC AND THROW A SLIGHT TARDIS NOISE TO THROW THE WHOVIANS INTO PANDEMONIUM, ALSO WE MUST QUOTE THE HUNGER GAMES TO TRY AND BRING BACK THE DISTRICTS NOW LETS GET THE QUEEN AND JAMES BOND, OH FUCK IT THROW THEM OUT OF A HELICOPTER, ITS OUR OLYMPICS AND THIS IS WHAT WE SHALL DO WITH IT, YOU KNOW WHY? BECAUSE FUCK YOU THAT'S WHY
plot twist: london opening ceremony, jk rowling flies in on a broom,
carrying the torch, and declares quidditch will be a sport in the london olympic games.
queen: where the fuck are the arctic monkeys
the olympic ceremony looks like seeing into the brain of a stoned american when asked what they think england is like
there's so many athletes at this arctic monkeys concert
Beijing: We must be classy and perfect and mature.
London: WE WANT A FUCKING FORTY FOOT TALL VOLDEMORT,
THANKS!
i can’t hear you over our PARACHUTING MONARCH
“The Queen looks on - proudly I’m sure.”

The Queen: God save me.
the queen: now you're just some country that i used to own
where is anne hathaway and the flag of genovia
